4. Turned away at the Senate door. Do Tombstone and Stuart Smalley totally hate each other? If I were either of them, I would.
3. Larry King Live interviews Oprah about her war on weight. Not that there are any *actual* wars going on or anything.
2. Did anyone know that Congress is actually a Discotheque?
My friend Adam noted that it looked like a movie theater. I'm going to go a step further and say it looks like a cheap, movie theater-themed prom. And there are people suing to get here?
1. CNN's Sanjay Gupta has been offered the post of Surgeon General! Finally, the disenfranchised group of Sexiest Men as Voted by People Magazine have a place in our government. The greatest breakthrough since the historic inclusion of stars of Jingle All The Way. Thank god. I was so sick of that heartthrob gerrymandering.